New Blog New life

Hello guys,

I wish to let you know that I started a new blog, I feel that both “140 days of a new me” and “Work in progress” are not me anymore. I want to start a new page in my life which is why I decided to start a new blog. All I do is basically ramble about my health but some of you might relate to what I am going trough and we can all support each other.

Thank you all of you which have been amazing friend to me trough all the craziness in my life. I do carry all of you in my heart. If you wish to make part of my new blog, please follow me there. It’s still in its beginnings but with your help it might grow. 🙂

https://keeponworking.wordpress.com/2014/12/10/i-am-a-work-in-progress/

xoxoxo

Sarah-Jane

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Start Over

When I was younger, I had the goal to lose weight but for all the wrong reasons, I just wanted to look great and have the “Perfect” body. I wanted attention from guys and to fit in and not be seen as somewhat different. The thing is I wasn’t really overweight, I was just a beautiful girl that thought she was fat. Being very tall for the normal Maltese height made me always look bigger next to anyone, I wasn’t really fat but taller and with a wider frame. I was a normal healthy kid that should have eat a bit healthier. However it wasn’t really my fault, I just didn’t know any better, this is what my parents were used to so it was just transferred to me.

As time goes by all of the bad food choices, pile up and create a mass of fat, which needs to be burned with a healthy diet and exercise. Little did I know that I had to work hard and do a lot of sacrifices. NOW I DO and it’s freaking hard. When you have been eating bad things most of your life, and now you are changing everything in a house where everyone eats bad things. Yes it sucks, but in a way or another I have to fight it. Why? cause now I know better!

I know that if I keep eating all of the bad stuff, I will end up like my mum. Taking a box full or pills and injecting myself with insulin everyday. There are days where I forget what this lifestyle will cause me, however this is why I have this blog to remind me. I think I deserve a better life, so I should work hard to have that.

I want to lose the weight, not so everyone says, “Oh what a nice body you have”. I want to do it so that I am happy with my body. I want to be fitter, healthier in my skin and not cringe every-time I see myself naked. It’s not going to be easy, I know but what do I have to lose?

The funny thing, I will probably go back and read all of this , and think what the hell am I bubbling around? Well, this is just me saying everything I feel, and No I’m not drunk unfortunately. Just a sober woman writing on her blog which probably no one reads, but hey that’s me, and I’m only human.

So I’m posting, click “Publish”

 

This Crazy thing we call LIFE

Hello guys,

Long time no seen, well it’s my fault of course. I barely have time for myself right now, imagine me having time to blog. If you read my crazy posts, you would know that I am currently rehearsing for the coming concerts called Voices Heart and Soul. It consists of two weeks of constant concerts from Wed until Sunday and the money all goes to charity. It has been exhausting, but it all worth it in the end, especially knowing that we are helping out people in need.

I am loving this experience as well, cause I have met some awesome people that are so caring and giving. But I have to be honest, I cannot wait for it to be over, I need to take care of myself again. I have gained a few kilos back, though I have no idea how much I truly weigh right now.

Last time at work my colleagues started talking about weight again and some of the crazy diets they have done.The result was always the same, they lose the weight pretty fast then gain it all back after they get fed up. I have done some pretty crazy diets myself, there was a time I was so obsessed all I was eating was 2 apples a day, imagine that. Nowadays I eat everything, I may not always eat healthy or the right things but I moderate as much as I can. I lost weight very slowly but I lost it and I haven’t gained weight as fast as I would if I did these silly diets. I learned how to keep my weight under control and believe me it wasn’t easy, especially these couple of months  as i had no time to cook healthy and no one to prepare anything for me, so I always ended up buying.

So when all of this is over, I am hoping to have time to exercise, take care of myself and enjoy the life I was given. I know maybe this is out of context but I’ve realized how much we don’t actually live in the NOW, we always think of what we are going to do instead of start making a change Now, or appreciate what we have now. I may not have the thing I want but I have achieved a lot in my life, I have grown and I am healthier now than I was a few years ago. It doesn’t mean I will stop working hard for the better, just enjoying the journey I am on.

In a few weeks I will hopefully be back to tell you about my daily craziness and how my weight loss is going

Appreciate the Now and if you don’t like your Now, do something about it 🙂

XOXO

Sarah-Jane

September be nice to me

Hi guys,

This months absence was due to the fact that there wasn’t a single good thing happening in my life. Like seriously nothing, all of the things I care/ed about has deteriorated. My job, my health, my car and now even my phone.

You know I am or else i try to be very positive, but no matter how much I tried is still bit me in the ass. Like even my sister admitted that I had like the worst month ever, cause all I would tell her was the crazy shit that happened in my life.

I am not writing for you to pity me or anything like that, like I couldn’t really care less what people though of me, especially now. But there are just days where you just can’t have it all, and life will hit you with a storm after another until it sucks all the life there is in you. I truly understand bitter people more than ever, because they probably went trough all the shit you can imagine, probably even worse than mine.

This month, I went trough a lot of shit at work, some of my colleagues were really mean to me, for their own pleasure of seeing me suffer. I love my job, for me it’s easy and I do it really well, and I love a challenge when designing, however I just cannot take some of the bullshit at work and the long hours I do. I don’t have a life anymore. So I am working really hard for a big change in my life.

Apart from that, I’ve been getting the worst things, from car tickets to broken things and to top it all, someone stole my phone :'(. So yeah, i just cannot but call myself unlucky. I really had no time to breathe, and they all happened a few days apart. I am simply exhausted of feeling like crap all day.

I am hoping that September will be good to me, I just cannot take anymore bad things. I need some good news, just something good in my life that will give me the courage to keep fighting the crazy life. I need to have time to take care of myself and be healthy cause I am truly killing myself right now with bad food and stress.

Fingers crossed, ill be better

XOXO

Defeat

I accept defeat, I cannot make time for exercise. Some of you might say oh “of course you can”, but if you had my schedule you would would agree. Even my best friend who’s really athletic and fit, could find a time for me to exercise in my crazy schedule.
I basically work from 9 till 7pm everyday except wendesdays, on Tuesdays and Thursday straight after work I have rehersals which end at 9:30pm, at about 10pm im home. I get an hr or two to prepare myself for the next day and maybe time to relax a bit. I am sleeping most of the time at midnight and getting up at 7:30am, which is the normal hours of sleep anyone should get.


Been trying to get up early at about 6:30am but I am not going to sacrifice my only 7 hr sleep of the day, I get so exhausted, I need all the sleep I could get. Then on the days I dont have any rehersals, I try to do some chores, like washing my clothes, clean my room and plenty of other stuff. Apart from that, there is always some type of events like for example this week, like my sisters concert, or birthday parties, which I cannot miss.
So yes, I am pretty much defeated, however what was suggested to me is that I eat well and healthy. Hopefuly after october I get my ass in the gym and start working out again. Eventhough I am not running or lifting weights, I am still pretty much everywhere doing everything. It’s not the same but it’s not that far apart either. For some crazy reason, if I don’t work out I don’t feel I am doing anything with losing weight, when the food is as important as the workout if not actually more.
So instead of feeling bad that I cannot exercise I will make up for it by eating healthy. So that is my plan for the coming months. Let’s hope my eating will improve, even if it’s a bit hard in my current situation, cause i rarely have time to cook anything. Oh well, I will try to focus on one thing at a time, let think food now, and then workout later.
Let’s hope for the best
XOXO
SJ

It me again

Hello guys,
Sorry its been a long time since I posted anything, but with all the things I have going on, it is really hard to make time for blogging. Apart from that, it’s my fault I got the brilliant idea of having two blogs. My life is pretty much full, I just started rehearsing for the Voices concert once again. For those of you who don’t know what Voices is, it’s basically a 2 week concert which benefits a number of charities. It is a beautiful experience and I am lucky to take part in it once again and actually have a solo part too. We recently started rehearsing again and i basically have two reversals every week from now until Mid August then 3 rehearsals a week in October. Apart from that, Make-up jobs are really blooming and great opportunities are coming along the way, so I am pretty happy.
Then of course I have to make time for myself and actually relax with friends. But what has unfortunately taken a back seat? Of course is eating healthy and working out. I know same crap different day. But honestly I am so tired from trying to make time for everything that, that I rarely have time to actually relax.

I need to adapt and plan a new workout schedule for myself. I need to start working out again even if only just 3 times a week, I truly let myself go to some extent, I barely have time for myself anymore. However this weekend I plan to organize myself a bit more, do some pampering so I am back to normal and make time for workouts. I need to get up early and workout, even if I sleep late at night, cause I cannot keep using the same excuse over again. NO EXCUSES.

Apart from that I do feel great, I have awesome friends to which I spend nice relaxing weekend with in Gozo. I am making new friends along the way and apart from the long hours at work, I am loving my life. All I have to do is basically try to fit in some workouts, because even if my eating is not the best, being that I am so busy I need to eat a bit more or else I’ll have no energy. Thankfully when I don’t have time to prepare lunch, there is a shop close by, where they do pretty decent wraps and salads. So at least I am sorted when I am too tired to prepare anything. I did have quite an unhealthy weekend at Gozo, but being that I am so busy all week, I barely have time to eat let alone eat unhealthy.

My weight has gone up and down and then up again, but now I am pretty much at the same weight. It is time I worked my butt off and started losing some weight once again. Fingers crossed

XOXO

SJ

Life and Singledom

Hey guys,

This week has started on pretty well, I am exercising again and even though my eating habits haven’t progressed much, I feel good. I am waking up early before work and doing my workouts. Trying my best to eat well throughout the day, even though I am not entirely healthy. The scale isn’t moving much unfortunately,  but I have to admit that I am seeing changes in my body. It is getting toned and firmer which is still very nice :D.

Recently as you know I have been having a lot of time on my hands (being that my friends are studying, BUMMERR :/ ) but instead of doing something beneficial, I have been having a lot of dates with random guys. Before you think I am some kind of slut because I have dates with random guys hehe. Let’s say I like to keep my options open so if a cute or average guys asks me out,  I will say yes. Some of you might think it’s so cool to have dates, well it’s not really. You have to always make sure you look pretty, have to be prepared for awkward and silent moments and that you might not like your date or the date might not like you.  These are the crazy things all single women go through, but if you take things easy you shouldn’t worry too much and have fun.

Yet these dates didn’t change anything in my life, if not waste my time with completely ridiculous men out there. I have to say it, it is really hard to find genuine men and the same goes to us women. All the good stuff is already taken or gay, so all I am left with is either superficial guys or those that just want to have fun and will bed every woman they meet.

So instead of being further disappointed of my love life, I choose to do something better with my time. Like getting to know myself better and do the things I love, like singing and blogging. Or even better focus on getting healthier and maybe cook a bunch of healthy yummy stuff. I should take care of myself before I take care of others.

Today I finish early from work, and instead of going out on a random date, I will take care of myself. Whatever that might be, if to either pamper myself or clean my messy room, I am sure it will make me feel a whole lot better.Life if just crazy and messy on its own, that we all need time alone to think, and make sense out of everything.

So there is goes another chapter of my life. It might have had anything to do with my weight loss, but seriously everything effects how we are with our diet, it’s a lifestyle after all J

XOXO

SJ